What not say to a police officer

http://images.wookmark.com/55513_wha...ce_officer.jpg

I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.

Is that a 9mm? That's nothing, look at my 44 Magnum brah.

You must have been going over 120 to keep up with me.

Sorry Officer, my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

I was going to be a cop, but decided to finish high school instead.

Are you the guy from the village people?

Bad cop. No donut.

Your not going to check my truck are you?

Gee that gut doesn't inspire confidence.

Didn't i see you get your butt kicked on cops?

I pay your salary.

Wow, you look like the guy in the picture on my girlfriends night stand.

I thought you had to be in good shape to be a police officer.

Is it true people become cops because they can't get a job at McDonalds?

Well, when i reached down to pick up my bag of crack, my gun fell out and lodged between the brake and gas.